Can I have it all?

  In my first post, I wrote that I was a young scientist that wanted to have it all. On Wednesday, Professor Anne-Marie Slaughter wrote an amazing article for the Atlantic titled “Why women still can’t have it all”. Should I take that as my final answer?

  I’m still working my way through the ideas and implications in the article – I suspect it will take a couple readings – but I think that it’s got many interesting and valid points. Prof. Slaughter writes from the perspective of a former high-level director at the State Department, and what struck me was that for her a return to academia represented a return to a more reasonable schedule. For me, the academia schedule is the highest bar I want to have to deal with! The main message I came away with from this article was that ‘having it all’ is nigh impossible in the current culture of work and family. This is in contrast to the message that women can have it all, perhaps just not at the same time. The extreme amount of time Prof. Slaughter devoted to her job meant that her family life suffered, even more so than when she was a professor. Obviously she is an intelligent, driven, well-spoken woman (argh, don’t read the comments after the article if you want to have a good day), and her inability to have a satisfying work and family life means, to me, that something’s wrong with what we expect women to give up in order to succeed.

  Another idea in the article I responded strongly to: the idea that if you’re working late or long hours, you must be more committed. I’ve not doubt that late and odd hours are often the only time working mothers have to attend to work matters when they’re home. I think of graduate students with children (it takes a much stronger person than I do make that work) who spent nights in the lab to insure they’d be around during the day, or who juggled babysitters to make sure they could teaching for hours in the afternoon*.  I feel lucky that my graduate department and current post-doc institution didn’t demand long hours in the lab or imply that all-nighters were the sign of true dedication. For me, time to unwind and exercise mean I’m more productive during the hours I work. And if/when I’m a parent, I don’t want to feel that if I’m not at work at all times, I’m a bad scientist.

   Why did I decide to write this blog? It’s not meant for navel gazing, it’s meant for me to air my concerns and worries about what being a successful scientist means for my personal life. And this article resonated with me in part because I worry that ‘having it all’ really means ‘having half of all of it’. As you probably guessed, this article has spawned a large debate about how women can be successful. The New York Times wrote a summary article (one response to that article by blogger Dr. Isis here) and included a very thoughtful conversation with the author. I look forward to reading more, because just having the debate means we’re thinking about these issues.

 *One idea for changing academia for the better – consult professors and teaching assistants with children about their worktime preferences before scheduling classes or assigning lab sections.

Literature Cited

Slaughter, A.-M. (2012). Why women still can't have it all. The Atlantic. July/August.

P.S. Lori Gottlieb posted a reply on the Atlantic's site here. She argues that the fact that Prof. Slaughter wants it all is not a feminist issue, but a life-time-management issue, and that in short there's not enough time in the day to have it all. And she compares Prof. Slaughter to a kindergartener.